MKMMA Week 18…If I’m being honest…

If I’m being honest, I feel like I’m in a sort of purgatory.  There’s no way I’m going back to the way things used to be.  I know all too well how much good all of my new habits are, and how much my life can be changed by applying the master key system.  That being said, I’m not sure where to go from here.  Not entirely sure.

purgatory_2

I feel the heart of my DMP is correct, but I’m not sure, and then I hear my heart saying something but I can’t quite make out what it is.

In different ways I’m trying to picture my future self and pick out what I want and not focus on what I don’t want, but I’m still not sure my Personal Pivotal Needs are really correct!

All this indecision amounts to one thing: refusal of the call.  The call to do what?!  Take the Hero’s Journey I know, but where is that?  Some days I’m SO INCREDIBLY SURE what that means, and others I have NO EARTHLY IDEA what that means.

Lately I’ve been feeling a little nutty but that’s ok because I think it means I’m close to a breakthrough.  I sure as hell am NOT GOING TO QUIT.  I persist until I succeed.  And I know in my heart there’s no turning back.  I just need to keep moving forward, even if it’s inch by inch because dangit I know I am golden inside and I have something to give!  I will find a way to give of myself!

If you pray, please pray for  me.  If you send out healing energy, please send some my way.  I’m thinking thoughts of courage, generosity, abundance, and peace.

All my love to you all.

Alicia

 

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